Uncategorized

While I was taking a shower this morning, the Boy Scouts’ motto popped into my head. It goes as follows:

This seems like a lot of pressure to put on a 13 year old. Little wonder that most boys prefer skateboarding to scouting. Skateboarders neither enforce nor encourage any of these twelve requirements – especially the “courteous” and “clean” ones.

Spain’s Parque Retiro is one of Europe’s finest urban parks. Located in central Madrid, Retiro is home to fountains, ponds, amphitheaters and thousands of trees.

It also features many statues, like the one pictured above.

Here we see the famous Spanish monk Pedro Ponce de Leon who, in the 16th century, developed a primitive form of sign language for deaf children. But alas…the pupil above seems to have learned the language a bit too well, as it appears that Brother Ponce is about to punch the little tyke’s lights out in an effort to shut him up.

…I’ve finally found a good Indian restaurant in Madrid. A very good one, in fact. Here are its details:

Taj Indian Restaurant

Calle Marqués de Cubas, 6

28014 Madrid

Metro: Banco de España (Cibeles)

Tel: 91 531 5059

Isn’t that great? Now if I can just find a descent Chinese restaurant in Madrid, maybe Calvin Trillin will return my calls.

I’ve been cruising “chicks” lately. Chickpeas, that is. It’s not hard to do in Spain and unlike cruising the other kind of chicks, no hair mousse is required.

Chickpeas are typically associated with the cuisines of India and the Middle East, but feature prominently in many Spanish dishes as well. And of those dishes, none is more important or ubiquitous than Spain’s famous Cocido.

Cocido is, in essence, a boiled-in-one-pot meal. Chickpeas (a.k.a., garbanzos), chicken, chorizo sausage, fatback, beef hunks, turnips, potatoes, cabbage, carrots, leeks and various other ingredients (depending on where and by whom it is made) are simmered in a large pot for hours. The meats and vegetables are removed and set aside, and short noodles resembling broken pieces of thin spaghetti are boiled in the broth until softened.

The meal is then assembled. The broth and noodles are served as the first course. Second course consists of the boiled meats and vegetables, which are arranged on each person’s plate in neat little segregated piles. A Cocido meal is typically accompanied by long, thin, pickled guindilla peppers, crusty bread and a glass (sorry…glasses) of red wine.

Cocido tastes good, of course, but its immense popularity in Spain is also due to practical reasons. Home cooks love it because its preparation is relatively easy and hands-off. Just toss in whichever meats or vegetables happen to be in your pantry at the time, then sit on the couch and immerse yourself in the intellectual rigors of Hola magazine for the next couple of hours.

Cocido can also be economical. My mother-in-law informs that her mother religiously made it once per week because – if the meats were avoided or minimized – it was a cheap way to feed the family during those lean years under Spain’s dictatorship.

Of course, historical integrity is often lost on restaurateurs – particularly those located elsewhere. I once ordered a pricey Cocido at an “upscale” Spanish restaurant in Chicago, and it came loaded with duck. No offense to the chef (who obviously put a lot of thought into unnecessarily modernizing this classic dish), but I don’t want any waiter to hand me a plate of duck unless it is accompanied by chopsticks and a fortune cookie.

Cocido is made differently in different parts of Spain. But Madrid’s version – known as Cocido Madrileño – is the most popular. Cocido Madrileño can be found in many bars and restaurants in that fine city, but my favorite is the following:

Casa Pello

Called Doctor Castelo, 2

Madrid

Tel: 91-574-0103

Tasty. Relatively inexpensive. And 100% duck-free.

Well…I can’t say that I’m particularly pleased with the outcome of last night’s election. In fact, I was feeling quite distraught when the BBC announced to my disbelieving ears that W had all but locked-in Ohio early this morning. But then…a thought occurred that made me feel a little better.

When the next four years are over, George W. Bush will never again be President of the United States. But the vast majority of those misguided Ohio voters who drove the final nail into John Kerry’s coffin will STILL BE LIVING IN OHIO!

HA HA HA HA HA!!!

And on that note, I promise that this blog will – from this day forward – once again be a politics-free zone. Until the next Washington sex scandal, at least.

Regular readers of this blog know that it is – by and large – a politics-free zone. And for good reason. The world is full of clueless yet politically-opinionated blogs, and certainly doesn’t need another.

But today is election day in the US and because the entire world is watching with an unusually high level of interest, we’ve decided to make an exception.

As such, the editorial board of Sal DeTraglia’s Virtual Tapas Bar vigorously endorses John F. Kerry for President of the United States. We can provide a litany of reasons to support our decision, but the most compelling is that the incumbent, George W. Bush (pictured above), is a horse’s ass.

Congratulations to my brother-in-law, Pablo de Lora, whose book entitled Justicia para los Animales (pictured above) has won the 2004 Fundació Víctor Grífols i Lucas Investigation Award.

The book is a well-researched and well-argued manifesto in support of animal rights. It has been favorably reviewed in many media, including the Spanish daily El Pais.

The award ceremony takes place tonight in Barcelona, and will be followed by cocktails and an open-air pig roast.

Just kidding about the pig roast.

You can learn a lot about a culture from its cigarette warning labels.

The politically-correct United States posts the following warning on its cigarette packs: “The Surgeon General has determined that smoking can be hazardous to your health.”

Prim and proper Great Britain posts the following warning on its packs: “I say, old chap…do use caution whilst enjoying that cigarette; for a most unpleasant health effect may result. Most unpleasant, indeed.”

But my favorite warning label is Spain’s. Anyone who is familiar with the bluntness and economy of the Spanish language will surely appreciate the photo above (which, by the way, is real). In English, it translates to…“SMOKING CAN KILL YOU!!!”



Doesn’t leave much room for interpretation, does it?

But if you think Spain’s cautionary message lack subtlety, just imagine the warning label on a pack of Russian cigarettes!

Since I started this blog in Autumn 1956, I’ve received countless complaints from readers concerning the posting of comments. Specifically, they bemoan the fact that they must register as a Blogger member – and obtain a Username and Password – in order to post a comment to my blog.

Well…I’m afraid that I must debunk – once and for all – this all-too-convenient excuse for the laziness of my readers.

Let it be known far and wide! My blog accepts comments from EVERYONE. That includes Blogger members, non-members and everything in between…including ex-business forms salesmen. In fact, my blog has been set up this way since Day 1. Here’s all you need to do:

1. Go to the bottom of a particularly brilliant post and click on “[#] Comments.”

2. Go to the bottom of the next screen and click on “Post a Comment.”

3. You will arrive at a screen entitled “Comment Sign In.” If you are a Blogger member, then type in your Username and Password. But if you are NOT Blogger member (and have no desire to be), then…

4. Click on “Or Post Anonymously.” Do you see it? It is right beneath the big, blue “Sign In” button. This will allow you to post a Comment without a Username or Password.

And when you post a message, please…please…please sign your name at the bottom. Otherwise, I won’t know which of you is offering me a publishing contract.