SAL DeTRAGLIA's VIRTUAL TAPAS BAR

I HEREBY DUB THEE…

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Sal DeTraglia

in

…The Salivator!

Congratulations to Frau Christina the Mausi, who effortlessly rattled-off the Grand Prize winner in my “Name that Smoker” contest.

And if that were not enough, she *also* suggested the Second Place-winning name: “The PorkMeister.”

The PorkMeister will be called upon to assume full smokification duties if The Salivator cannot fulfill its obligations for reasons of illness, death or scandal.

Honorable mention goes to ChicagoKarl for his contribution, “Pepe le Q.”

The “If at First You Don’t Succeed Award” goes to Euro-Trac, who submitted no less than 87 entries—many of which were lifted directly from “The Partridge Family.”

Thanks to everyone who participated. And to Mausi…I’ll see you and the three boys at Easter.

PS: A Tupperware container full of Haggis Meatballs goes to the first person who can identify the dude pictured above. And yes…he *is* relevant to this post.

Comments

12 responses to “I HEREBY DUB THEE…”

  1. Alison Avatar
    Alison

    Pavlov – although it was a bit of a give away that the file was still called ‘Pavlov.jpg’ 🙂 I’ll give the meetballs to my hubby – he’ll eat anything 🙂

    Reply
  2. Sal DeTraglia Avatar
    Sal DeTraglia

    Well…that kinda ruins my fun. But I’ll give you bonus points for ingenuity.

    Guess I need to go out and find a sheep to kill now. Hmph!

    Sal

    Reply
  3. Kath Avatar
    Kath

    Ivan Pavlov = Smoked Meat???

    So smoking is a conditioned reflex? Enlighten us oh wiseman cause I’m dead curious!!!

    PS – I’m so glad someone else ‘won’ the meatballs…. blech!

    Reply
  4. Sal DeTraglia Avatar
    Sal DeTraglia

    Katheter: I guess you’ve had your fill of Haggis for Q1, so you’re off the hook.

    [For those of you scatching your heads, Kath was in Edinburgh with me. She also wore a skirt, but mine showed more leg.]

    Here’s the Pavlov connection, although you’ll kick yourself for not figuring it our for yourself.

    Pavlov = Salivating dogs.

    Salivating dogs = Grabbing a mop and mopping the floor.

    Mopping the floor = Temperamental housewives/husbands.

    Temperamental housewives/husbands = Nervous disorders.

    Nervous disorders = A search for mental and emotional calming.

    A search for mental and emotional calming = Partaking of vices.

    Partaking of vices = A drink of alcohol.

    A drink of alcohol = Lowered inhabitions.

    Lowered inhabitions = A propensity to engage in additional destructive behaviors.

    A propensity to engage in additional destructive behaviors = Driving your car to the nearest convenience store.

    Driving your car to the nearest convenience store = Impulsively buying, heating and consuming a microwavable burrito on the store’s premises.

    Impulsively buying, heating and consuming a microwavable burrito on the store’s premises = The need for an after-dinner cigarette.

    The need for an after-dinner cigarette = Smoke.

    Smoke = Smoker.

    Smoker = The Salivator.

    Therefore…The Salivator = Pavlov.

    Get it? Duh!

    Sal

    Reply
  5. christina Avatar
    christina

    Well, duh! Who wouldn’t get that? Crystal clear. 🙂

    Wow, you mean I actually won? Thank you so much! I am truly honoured (and also strangely embarassed in a nice sort of way.)I’d like to thank my parents for giving me a university education and a twisted sense of humour.

    Actually, I think I used up the last of my brain cells on that one and will need some time to recover before entering any more contests of this sort.

    Easter sounds good – somewhere near Madrid right? We’ll just follow the smoke and I’m sure we’ll find it. 😉

    Reply
  6. euro-trac Avatar
    euro-trac

    Oh Yes… That’s very fair! Christina had it sewn up from the beginning!!!! Plus, I like my award… alot!! It’s the first time I’ve ever been awarded for effort!! I’m such a quitter as a rule!! 🙂

    Reply
  7. christina Avatar
    christina

    Oh yes, euro-trac was fabulous!! She gets a medal (and a meatball) for perseverance.

    And I liked Pepe le Q very much. Way to go Karl.

    Free drinks for everyone at my place! Just try not to wake me up by clinking your glasses too loudly.

    “rather than the riff-raff we normally get in here”

    Reply
  8. woman wandering Avatar
    woman wandering

    I knew Salivator was unbeatable but I gave it a little shot anyway. Congrats Christina!

    The Pavlov connection … I’d quite like to make a post of your explanation … it would make me look normal, I’m almost sure of it.

    Reply
  9. Culinary Fool Avatar
    Culinary Fool

    Excuse me!! Are you making fun of my meatballs, mister?!?!? You are soooo busted!

    ~ BeePee

    Reply
  10. Nyana Avatar
    Nyana

    I like meatballs, especially if they’re spicy.
    I’m sending an extra batch, with courrier, to Sal and Christina for having utmost respect for the personalities of inanimate objects. Guys: this world needs more non-discriminating individuals like yourselves. Thank you. (I actually have names for my wooden spoons- makes life more interesting 😉

    Reply
  11. Sal DeTraglia Avatar
    Sal DeTraglia

    Lady Di: I’ll waive my normal 87% royalty just this once.

    Beep: I wouldn’t dream of mocking your meatballs. Each one, a self-contained little planet of finely-minced lamb parts married with a perfectly-balanced sprinkling of ground leaves, stems and roots. Then delicately rolled between your loving palms until each little orb is expertly compacted into a bite-sized ticket on the magical, mystical, technicolor roller coaster of flavor.

    Man! Now I’m hungry. Think I’ll go eat one of my cats.

    Sal

    Reply
  12. Jo Avatar
    Jo

    Aw, you didn’t name it after me! ::sigh:: You realize you used the traditional method whereby schoolboys in Spain assign nicknames to their chums? One of my dad’s best friends was “El Datil” by that very method. I’ll have to see if I can get the “road map”…

    Reply

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